Scratch n' Sniff

My interest in perfume began in 1988 - the summer before 8th grade. It was when we lived in Germany and my Dad took us to the French PX, which had a whole section of perfume. I think we may have gone with his co-worker and his co-worker's family, because I remember my friend Lisa's Mom getting some Joy perfume. My Mom got Chanel No 5 soap. I have a vague recollection of trying Lou Lou, but didn't buy it (perhaps I should track it down?). I thought the Joy and the Chanel No 5 both smelled pretty good, but I chose Anais Anais. I got the lotion instead of the eau de toilette. I think I kind of forgot about it until we moved back to the states that summer. I didn't really know that the lotion wasn't supposed to be used like Jergen's lotion. So, I slathered it all over my legs right before we were going to be picked up by a guy from the Mazda dealership where my Mom's car was being serviced. When we got in the little mini-van, my Mom started to act kind of weird and uncomfortable. When we got out, she hissed, "Are you wearing perfume? How much did you put on? That guy is going to think that I was wearing too much perfume!!" That's when I realized that a little goes a long way.

I kind of went off perfume for a while and then in 1993, I asked for a Chanel No 5 gift set from my parents for Christmas. I loved the soap (my Mom still loves it - I actually got it for her for Christmas this year!). However, the lotion and the eau de toilette were too much for an 18 year old. I don't think I ever used them up. Then in the late 90s and early 2000's, I happily wore Happy and Aromatics Elixir from Clinique. Aromatics Elixir was more of an earthy sandalwood scent. I only wore it occasionally. I really loved Happy. I even asked for (and got) it for Christmas of 2000. I wore it every day until I actually used up the whole container. And then, I noticed a lot of other people wearing it, too. Having the same jeans or sweater in another color as someone else is no biggie. But wearing the same scent just felt like having identical outfits on. So, I stopped wearing Happy or any other perfume. Until now.

I have been experimenting with perfume lately. Every time I order something from Sephora, they give me the option for free samples. I figure, I don't feel like fighting with a tiny packet of moisturizer, so why not get some scent. Free is free, so if any of the samples are an olfactory assault, then I can just trash them.

So far, I have gotten Taylor Swift's perfume (kind of nice - it's light and sweet. I would actually wear it), Kate Walsh's Boyfriend (very musky and heavy - I'm using it as bathroom air freshener. Nothing like the smell of perfume and poo mixed together), Diane Von Furstenburg's perfume (really mature smelling - it reminds me of classy older women that I encountered in Germany at stores where I couldn't afford anything), Betsy Johnson's Too Too (kind of fresh and sweet - not too gaggy), Tom Ford's Violet Blonde (very heavy and intense - not really me), and Juicy Couture's Viva La Juicy (I really liked this one. It's light and has food smells like vanilla. I might have to buy some.).

I have also been smelling the perfume sample inserts in magazines. I am in love with Viktor and Rolf's Flowerbomb. Even though it is a floral fragrance, to my nose it has a candy quality that I can't get enough of. I asked for the hair mist for Christmas. We'll see if Santa comes through for me.

Whatever scent I am wearing, I will try to go easy on it. But please don't hesitate to inform me if I smell like a French whore. (Uh, I think my whore is dead.)