I'm ba---aaack

So, I haven't posted in almost a year. Where to begin? A lot has changed, and yet nothing has changed. These are the days of our lives, grasshopper. Or something like that.

What I can say for sure if that I have missed the self absorbed indulgence that blogging brings me. Facebook is not the same. I am not witty with just 140 characters or whatever you are limited to on Facebook updates. If I wants to blather on about the lady at Safeway with the bedazzled eyepatch, then, by God, I need space. Lots of space.

Plus, take my recent trip to the Goodwill with my Mom and my Aunt as an example. I just posted on Facebook about it, but it will be lost in the shuffle with posts about Mafia Wars, groups for people who don't want to know that you just had a bagel for lunch, and updates from things that you randomly clicked "like" on and are too lazy to "unlike" them - like Dick's Drive-In. Sure, I like them, but do I really need updates from them? NO. Am I going to do anything about it? Let's be realistic. I have pictures of dirty pigs to post. I don't have the time. (Also, I'm not really sure how to "unlike" something and make it go away. It's easier to just scroll over it.)

Ok, so back to the pigs. My Aunt just started collecting pig figurines. So, when we were at the Goodwill, my Mom showed her these adorable pig salt and pepper shakers. They were wrapped in plastic, which we thought was odd, when all the other shakers were sitting on a shelf. But no matter, these were cute, pink pigs, for the low, low price of $1.50. My Aunt was sold!

When we got home and she unwrapped the pigs and set them on the table, we were all silent for a moment.

Huh. I remarked, "Hey! One is sitting down and the other one is kind of standing up! And they fit together, like they're sitting together or something or...Oh, my God!!!"

My aunt exclaimed, "They're fornicating pigs!!"

Oh, dear.

These are the types of hijinks and shenanigans that I tend to get up to. You know you've missed knowing every intimate detail.